Logan’s Desire

Excerpt

The hole in her heart, which had begun with Logan’s rejection of her, had grown since her grandmother’s stroke until it had become excruciating.

It took everything out of her.

She’d never known it was possible to be so tired.

So empty inside.

Dropping her head onto the bed, she kept her grandmother’s hand clasped in hers and let herself sleep.

Logan found her that way, the relief at finally finding her so intense, he paused just inside the door to look at her.

He moved closer, the low music coming from a small speaker on the bed both calming and depressing as hell.

It sounded like the music played in funeral homes during a funeral.

Katherine, sitting in a chair, her head on her folded arms on the bed, faced away from him, but he could see clearly that she’d lost a good bit of weight.

Furious that she’d kept this from them, he leaned against the wall, taking in the plain, colorless room, the monitors and the tubes running in and out of the old, too-pale woman sleeping peacefully.

He watched them for almost an hour, straightening when the left side of Eleanor’s body began to twitch restlessly and several of the monitors started beeping.

Katherine jolted upright, looking over when several nurses burst through the door, her already too-pale face paling even more when she saw him. “What’s going on?”

Her grandmother suddenly stilled, and the nurse took Kat’s arm. “You need to move.”

The nurse nudged the chair out of the way, and as they worked on her grandmother, Logan went to Kat and gently pulled her aside.

She gasped. “What are you doing here? Go away!”

Stiffening against him, she tried to pull away, but Logan held firm, pressing his lips against her ear. “Stop fighting me.”

He turned her toward him, holding her against his chest and watched the nurses’ faces and the monitor that flat-lined.

Katherine jolted and turned, shaking her head. “No!”

Another nurse and a doctor came in and after listening to her grandmother’s chest, the doctor sighed and met Kathy’s gaze.

Releasing her so she could go to her grandmother’s side, Logan followed as the doctor kept his gaze on Kathy’s. “I’m sorry. She had another stroke. It was more than her body could handle.”

Watching Kat wrap her arms around her grandmother, her sobs racking her body, Logan felt his heart break.

Nodding to acknowledge the doctor, he went to stand behind Kat, running a hand up and down her back in an effort to soothe her and to let her know she was no longer alone.

She cried so hard he feared she would make herself sick before finally straightening, a shudder going through her.

Kathy felt a sense of disbelief, feeling a distance from her surroundings, as if she was watching the incredibly sad scene play out in a movie. A kind of blessed numbness settled over her and made it possible for her to allow Logan to help her into her cardigan and lead her out of the room.

Voices around her faded into the background, the words jumbling together and unrecognizable.

She knew Logan spoke to the nurses at the nurses’ station, his deep tone one she could never forget, but it took too much effort to decipher his words.

His voice, deep and soothing, was enough.

God, she’d missed him.

She shivered, cold everywhere except the hand he held in his.

She went where he guided her, which allowed her to stop thinking altogether.

Logan led her to his car, the arm around her firm, warm, and solid. He paused at the passenger door, drawing her against him. “I’m here for you, baby. You’re not alone. Just lean on me. I’ll help you get through this.”

Pressing her face against his shoulder, she breathed him in, tears filling her eyes and spilling over. “She’s gone, Logan. I wanted her to get better. I didn’t want to believe…”

“I know, love.” He ran his hands up and down her back, his lips pressing against her hair. “I know how much she meant to you. Let me get you home.”

“I don’t have a home anymore.” The reality of it hit her hard. She got into the passenger seat, unmoving as he fastened her seat belt and closed the door again.

Staring out the window, she leaned her head back, still reeling with her grandmother’s death and Logan’s sudden appearance. She’d loved him for years, loved him so much that when he told her that things wouldn’t work out between them, it broke her heart.

Even now, when nothing else seemed to get through the fog surrounding her, her feelings for him did.

For him to show up so suddenly, just when she needed him most, was both a blessing and torture. Leaning on him gave her the comfort and strength she needed, but she knew it was temporary and her heart would break all over again when he left.

He would leave, and the loneliness would become unbearable.

“You shouldn’t have come. Why did you have to come?”

Reaching across, he took her hand in his. “If I’d known what was going on, I would have been here sooner.”

Too numb for embarrassment, she continued to stare out the side window. “I need you to go. I need to get over you.”

Logan stopped at a red light and turned her face to his, the warm firmness of his fingertips on her chin causing butterflies in her belly. “I can’t get over you, so why would I allow you to get over me?”